Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Celebrate

Yesterday Dustin and I celebrated our one year anniversary. It was a pretty simple celebration, but it was nice. Simple, for me, is just lovely. We woke up and went to the lake. I love the lake. Around where we live the lake is one of my absolute favorite places, especially hanging around the dam. So we went there, got some ice cream, he had plain and I had a strawberry sundae. Yum.

We took our ice cream and drove to the lookout point. We finished our ice cream then proceeded to sit in the grass, like a pair of flower children...which, funny enough, I was wearing the vintage pink/purple/orange long psychedelic skirt I picked up at the garage sale on Friday...but anyways, we exchanged gifts and he played guitar and sang one of my absolute favorite song; Whole Wide World by Wreckless Eric. That is, of course, until one of the strings broke. I guess he had been practicing the song for a few days without any guitar problems, but the first time he ever played and sang to me (ever, actually) the string broke. Despite how embarrassed he felt it was probably the sweetest thing he could have done on our anniversary.

After the lake we played one of the games I had given him, I set up the table with antique plates, flowers in glass pop bottles, and a few of our many instax photos of us together, and made a silly little lobster banner our of card stock paper and printed images of a quick lobster drawing I did just earlier. I made the lobster tails and four cheese pizza, we ate, we kissed, and we hung out the rest of the night.

Could we have done something elaborate and expensive? Perhaps. However, the simpleness of the day, to me, was the best thing about it. Another day in our life together. The start of our next year.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

One Year Dear

One year ago tomorrow the sky was grey, the grass was green, it rained but it wasn't cold, and the mosquitos were almost as bad as this year. My umbrella was getting a lot of lovin' and you weren't swarmed by sandflies when you walked out the door.

Tomorrow there is only a 40% chance of rain for the morning with comfortably warm tempertures and lots of sunshine in the afternoon. Two two lobster tails chill in my freezer awaiting a boiling pot of water and butter. What else will be tomorrow remains to be seen, no plans, see where the wind blows.

Tomorrow is Dustin and my first anniversary. One year ago tomorrow was our first date, and the first time I'd seen him in years. Nervousness and blushing. I gave him the white instax camera I had won and just came in the mail two days earlier, and we watched movies. Rather, we watched one movie and we snuggled and kissed the rest of the time. It's hard to believe that it's been a year already. So to my one and only Dust Bunny, I love you. We'll have many more crazy years ahead to share.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Garage Goodies

Friday is truly a great day. Especially when it's summer and there's a fair list of garage sales going on. Yesterday, being Friday, was no exception. Dad, Dustin, and I took a trip to our nearest little city and stopped off at at least twenty five garage sales, and I must say...I got the best deals.

Not including some new fabrics, I only spent about $5.10 yesterday. Yes, only $5.10 for this lot of greatness. The most expensive buy here being the 1960 copy of Chatelaine, which even at $2 was still a nice buy. Am I a lucky thrify lass or what? The purple, orange, and pink patterned piece you see in the photos is actually a long skirt that I decided was extremely cozy for lounging around in the grass and tending to my, rather sad, little garden.

The Sunbeam Mixmaster was another garage sale find I picked up about two weeks or so ago now. It was actually the little bit of sunshine on a very bad day...I hadn't slept and arrived at that garage sale around 7:30 AM, which for me is when I should be in a nice deep sleep, and with all kinds of drama going on at the time it was as if the mixer was saying "It's okay now, I'm here...let's make cookies". There was another there, a white one, which is the one I noticed first, but it was in rather rough shape so after spotting the silver I immediately took it instead. At 25$ it was exactly what I needed.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Play Nice Rice

Growing up I don't believe I ever made Rice Krispies treats (I was a puffed wheat cake kid). I ate a great many but never helped out to make them myself. Yes, I was a deprived child. Anyways, I've always heard how easy they were and seen the commercials of kids making them so of course I figured that it would be an instant success. Sadly, my first try at the Krispies was a major failure, as were the next few times. I was quite distraught at how something so seemingly easy just wasn't working out for me, and I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong.

After a few tries and a lot more love I, finally, successfully made Rice Krispies treats. Of all the desserts and treats I've tried and made, it was hard to believe this is the one that took the most time to really get right. The same recipe was used each time but with a lower stove temperature and a bit more love it finally worked out. You can imagine my pride.

That's one big obstacle down, and now to work on something new. Where to go next? Perhaps something more savory...There is such a lack of savory exploration in this house and it's about time to do something about it.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Dragging Me Down

http://ash-bunny.deviantart.com/art/Dragging-Me-Down-213030571
Another one of these days. How frequent they are becoming. I find myself wondering why I bother anymore...It gets harder and harder to try, to care, when the person you knew becomes something else more and more each day. I feel as though I've been tricked into this, promises and lies just to find out who you really are. It feels like the end, but I just don't want to see it because I'm holding onto the past, when things were happy, when you tried, when you cared...when you were someone else, someone I thought I knew.

I'm a fool...

Sometimes I think the weather knows how I feel. It's been very up and down today. A tiny bit of sun, then rain, clear, rain, heavy rain, thunder, calm, rain, and another crack of thunder...It's dark and rather dreary. It's nice though, when it thunders Hades loves to cuddle up, making things just a bit better. Ol' fluffy...heh.

Dreading tomorrow...
http://ash-bunny.deviantart.com/art/Lilac-Lies-213062464

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Granola Greatness

Just before June I had a brilliant idea to try making my own granola bar sort of treats. I didn't use a recipe and just sort of took what I knew from recipes that I had done previously and used what I had laying around the kitchen. They were great. Just great.

The treats were made simply from oatmeal and rice crisp cereal, and of course a sticky sort of coating. For the coating I actually halved (and slightly altered) my carmel corn recipe using simply brown sugar, butter, and corn syrup boiled up and mixed with just under two cups each of the cereal and oatmeal. It felt like a great, albeit simple accomplishment...it felt good. That may have been the last time I felt that good since.

Since making the granola treats things seem to have just been getting worse. I have a hard time thinking of good things and it feels as though nothing matters anymore, that I don't matter, that life itself is just nonsense. Life feels how it felt when I was an angsty high school kid, and all the awful thoughts I thought back them have come rushing back.

Sometimes I think the only thing that keeps me where I am, putting up with all the nonsense and negative feelings is my puppy, Hades. It feels like he truly is my only friend in the world. No, he can't talk or give me a hug and say it's going to be okay...but when I feel bad he's there. It's comforting just to know he's there. He won't yell at me for saying how I feel, or call me down, make me feel worse, guilt me, or degrade me. He lays next to me so I can scratch his ears, just how he likes...just what I need.

Though this all may sound "dramatic" to some...I don't really care, it's just how I feel, and no one can tell me I'm wrong for feeling. Feeling is part of life, and this is how it is in my life right now. Though...I don't actually believe anyone reads this, so I suppose it's okay. This is for me, not for you.

On a slightly optimistic side, I've still been dreaming of old houses. Another little bit that keeps some hope in me. Our family home is in town and sits on two and a half acres of property, which got me thinking. All this time I'm looking at houses and never seeming to find the right one, or a lot of ones I love but have basement or foundation problems. Why don't I just look into moving a home onto the property? I wish I had thought of it before. I wouldn't really have to move, but I'd have my own place, a house, my dream. Now, the thing is in order to find out any sort of quotes and prices, I have to find a house to move and I have absolutely no idea where to start.

Anyways, more than likely these thoughts will all be a waste and it will end up costing more than I have saved up, but...it's still nice to have that one dream left.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Lovely Lilac

The lilacs and crab apple blossoms have started to bloom here. This is one of my favorite times of the year, the weather is warm, when you step outside the yard is surrounded by the delightful smell of lilacs, and the three crab apple trees are absolutely covered in white blossoms. A little break of nice in the middle of a rather unhappy time of my life.

Ahh wel. I snipped a few lilacs and blossoms and put them into various old (and new retro) glass pop bottles, a nice little decoration (and scent) for the dining room. I found it rather difficult to photograph them, and wonder if it's just a matter of skill or is it bad feelings? I tried my best nonetheless, perhaps tomorrow will be a better photo day...or perhaps not. I will miss the smell of lilacs.